A Day to Endure

I, again, had horrible dreams last night.  I am at Starbucks and there are quite a few people here.  My dreams are making it difficult to leave my apartment.  They are amazingly terrifying.  I will not describe it here, because I feel like it gives them power.  It is not easy to write today.  I am suffering from quite a bit of fatigue.  I'd love to write something funny, but there is nothing there.  Even a try at poetry is dry today.  The sun is down and the night air is cold.  I am still and reverent for every tree I see.  It has come time to pray and find the light around the shape of a cross.  As I feel the cold on my toes, I am quite happy that they have not frozen.  It is okay to be different in this moment, but not for long.  So much criticism my way takes away the light from the parts of me that are bright.  No one comes this way to stay, and most I would not want in my limited energy anyway.  Betrayal is in every footstep around me, and acceptance for the mystery of history, or mystical crosses that I endure, is not acceptable.  I do not put this forward for review, but maybe I can see myself practically.  The time has come.  I am not dumb.  I see the reality of the training from The East and The West.  I must endure until there is one soldier who will stand beside me for eternity.  He would have to be someone very strong, sensitive, and elite, thus special to eternity.  Come to me, dear one, I love you to the reality of the moon and stars.