Defamation and Betrayel

Today has been a difficult day to be seen outside my priest cell like room.  I stayed covered and still, and went between meditation and slumber.  I just did not want any outside energy to reach me.  I got up for a bit and watched TV, but then I went back to my place of solitude and feeling of safety.  I am now, finally, at my normal coffee shop.  It is difficult to find something to put on the page.  I have a sense of being caught in a wave, and being completely terrified of the under toe.  I was able to write a poem.  I had some positive thought stream that gave me the energy and fortitude to get ready and bring myself here.  I have noticed that this feeling has been pretty common this week.  Underneath it all, there is a gentleness.  There is a deer out there who calls to me, and speaks of plain speak about a quiet place in my life.  There are those who will be left by the road to be hit by a semi driver in a trance.  That has been their destiny the whole time due to their complete stupidity about the subject of trust.  Emotional intimacy was difficult, but necessary for me to evolve properly, but now there will be the clean up of those who betrayed me every day.