The last 24 hours has been a time to try my acumen of accessing the peace within under stress, and a time to take huge assaults to my character and dignity with grace, and to walk away. It is a very difficult practice to maintain. Dealing with predatory people who are insane with professional keys, calls on my every bit of patience and reverence for human life. It is strife I do not need, and I did almost pass out in an elevator today downtown at the YMCA. My lungs were so stressed, and I could not breathe due to capillary constriction from lung damage due to childhood illness, and I coughed to a point I thought that I might bleed. I just allowed it as I went down, and then quickly steadied myself for public view. I was waiting for an appointment and so I was able to stop at Starbucks, get a coffee, eat some cheese and crackers that were necessary due to my blood sugar drop, and then I made it on time to my appointment with Mohammed at Wells Fargo Bank. After a really nasty year at Huntington Bank, I now have a new space to be, and Mohammed listened so actively and with such compassion about the financial matters I needed to discuss. He explained all of the aspects to accounts, and I chose the proper savings and checking that I needed. He was a very powerful Jordanian proletariat officer who is CIA and DEA. He had impeccable boundaries and lasted long around my complicated case. He did also help me set up online banking and was patient when technical glitches arose through my cell phone. He helped me set up my secret code with dignified privacy. He gave me the form to take to Social Security to change my direct deposit. We talked a bit, colloquially about powerful Jordanians I have come upon in my travels here in Minneapolis, MN, and a bit about Queen Noor. I did have my passport to show him the complications of the matter, and I had my Rinpoche scarf, for comfort in my bag that I did show him that as well. I stopped by the YMCA to show Deb the books I received from Mary and Lucia and just checked the system with my card using their bathroom because they are scarce in the IDS. Hennepin County stalked pretty bad during my time at the bank, and the evidence was seen on my phone by Mohammed. He was pretty concerned for me and for the bank. Their 10 contacts to me today with no defined reason, was more than just excessive. I had no call from my doctor or nurse directly. I did call my doctor, report the matter and the inappropriate use of mychart by Hennepin County HCMC staff and Hennepin County Social Work in which they documented in a nonsensical way (easily checkable by him) and asked him to advocate on my behalf with the police against the social workers of Hennepin County. Hopefully he will take the threat seriously before malady is the reality all around him in the office, in documentation, and in HCMC technology and his technology personally. I have just written down a sugar cookie recipe and I think that I will bake them now. I went to bed early and got some good sleep. I really enjoyed doing my yoga and movement session last night after I finally took a nap after the siege had finished and the degradation in my soul eased, and I moved through to a rested muscle space of serenity. Masterful tradition was labeled by the intrusive EMH male phone operator at about 5 pm as malady and bringing in the reality of just the centering of exercise was seen as a tangential subject. I told him that it was wholistic medicine that is part of mental health. He did not agree. He really tried to convince himself that his violation of me was "help." He said that all I did was talk the whole time, and I told him that I thought that his job on this emergency line was to listen. He was just so offensive that he was actually absurd. He told me that it was actually for him to speak to me and tell me his take on me, but how could he do that without listening? I just quietly stayed silent while he ranted for about 3 minutes, nonsensically and vey offensively. Martinque was flashing on my phone. I felt so alone with this predator. Hopefully someone was listening, or it was taped. This man needs to be prosecuted and more than just taken out of the profession. I just told him at the end that we could be diametrically opposed and still leave the conversation peacefully. I told him that I needed to eat dinner because my blood sugar was dropping. He went on for a little while longer as social work and psychiatric profession predators do and medical professions do to me too, and I told him that I had actively listened to him, and I needed to go. He said goodbye and I hung up. I endure very active torture at the hands of psychiatry in lockdown for no reason at all. I do not make the call to them, and there is not emergent matter at all. You sick psychos know exactly what you are doing to me and how you are profiting from it in sick ways and in actual pay especially today. These professionals are very complicit, knowledgeable, arrogant, and I am only one person. All of my acumen is tested, and boy I do not feel like I "won" anything at all yesterday. Hopefully Hennepin County does not have a repeat performance planned for today. I am incredibly beat down and fatigued. More degradation, humiliation torture, and dehumanization are just so very cruel, but I will just soldier on as I always do and not complain. I document. It is not the same thing. I do it for my safety and to keep the vital resources that I have like housing and today, banking. I also do it because your accounts of me are far more than inaccurate and they are dangerous to my everyday survival. I have told my doctor's office not to call me back, but these nurses just won't quit. I have to call them back when they call, or they will attack just as Abott Northwestern Hospital with Park Nicollet longtime psychiatrists did around me so many years ago with my family, so illegally when industry chiefs were approaching me and I had lost 180 lbs. That was 20 years ago. Hopefully my time in hell will be brought to a quiet space of merely purgatory soon. I never deserved this, but I walk a strong spiritual path and just believe in a Grand Plan and in true selflessness that can bring about a revolution that will secure a heaven for those who will work for it. Delusions are great on the behalf of psychiatry and social work. They do not feel at all except for their sadistic pleasure towards torturing a responsible patient who got out, who feels so very deeply but has been very unable to even cry due to the torture and stricture she has endured at the hands of so many complicit agencies and entities, they will not stop or let me go. It is not treatment or care at all. Their study of me in first place was illegal, and now this is just ridiculous and far beyond ethical and is so cruel that I am in shock today. In this very unconstitutional process that is also cruel and inhumane treatment of a person who has committed no crime, who they have controlled in every way for 20 years without respite. They say what they want to say, file share illegally, lock people down illegally without premise in all community around me, blaming me, and then the community does this inappropriate and dangerous stalking of me too. It is a vicious cycle on me. I do feel fear at violation and at violent acts my way, but that is proper emotional response, not psychosis or paranoia. I will just state here, that I need Hennepin County to stay away from me today because I have not contacted you and if there is an actual emergent matter in the community, it is the Minneapolis Police's job to handle that situation no matter who it is. If a person is actually a threat to themselves or others, it is the police's job to access if an arrest or ambulance is necessary because even these behavioral health workers" are not trained to handle dangerous situations properly. Police around me are also unethical, nonsensical, disorganized, do not use body cams properly, do not answer calls properly, and will not listen to logic. Their mental health maladies are getting more severe due to HCMC psychiatry around me and their use of demeaning questioning of me when I am logically trying to report a crime with great cognitive care for their precious egos, insane brains, and lack of education. My process is very elite. They degrade me. I stay calm and I handle the task at hand. The police precinct will not even answer their phone around me anymore and I have never called them before. I let it ring 45 times the other day after I just tried 311 and they are nonemergency police reports and they said they could not help me because they are not police. I stay calm and reason through the way more than just bureaucracy. Today must handle my changeover of my direct deposit today and beyond that I do not know my schedule. I wish to not be diverted from my task or drained further by Hennepin County's very unstable and agitated staff. Be well. Dr. Jennifer K. Mayer 112
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