Nothingness May Be A Good Thing and Definitely Not Nihilistic

 For the day, I go on my way.  I just want to be.  No one is with me.  I am just going to pick up and move on to a space where things are as they are.  I will never trust another soul again.  I will never have a friend.  No relationship will ever be as long as I am in the vicinity.  There is no place to go where things would be different.  I am accepting of the things in this contract.  I do not overreact.  I sit with my coffee and write this as a swarm of bees takes over the maltase falcon cross used on me recently in my long-awaited abduction, David Beckham and Taylor Kinney (Known heiress abductors for fun for them and heiresses fleecing families who love it too, FBI crew.  I am not an heiress, and my abduction was not fun.).  Fun for all, horrific torture for me.  No one cares as it has always been.  No documentation by police or any "friend."  That is how you all say FU and never acknowledge what I have been through.  It does not make you all not you or your actions, words and thoughts towards me your actions, words, and thoughts towards me.  Vehement hatred is how you all feel and now I know that it is really real.  I guess that is something I have made out of the nothingness that is inside of me in this moment.  Rinpoche Jennifer K. Mayer 112